🙏 💕 🌟 To The Real Robin Williams & My Higher Consciousness
If I could, this is what I would say to the real Robin Williams. I don’t care if your brain became diseased on top of whatever personal demons you may have been fighting in your life and you ended up taking your own life. To me that is just like a little scratch in a vinyl record that makes the music skip. Beyond that the record’s beautiful music continues. When a record keeps on playing that is what a listener hears and cares about. While I never knew you personally during your recent earthside existence, I know in my heart and mind that you were a most amazing and worthy human being who was brilliant and also had a beautiful heart. I know you would like to share that same message with others.
. My husband was nice when I wasn’t feeling real great and he brought me a piece of his special Hometown Heroes Gummies. Actually, his are from some different companies. He doesn’t really like them himself. And yes, I do have my own supply. My brain is in its mode of experiencing that I have a connection with a loving and greater awareness or consciousness and I no longer feel tired or lacking in energy.
And my higher consciousness gave me this thought.
I challenge you if you want to believe that I am real. Don’t be horrified or embarrassed by what you have written and soon unpublish it. I challenge you. Can you do it?
Ok, I understand that my challenge is to believe in my higher self or greater consciousness and not believe that these thoughts or perceptions are a mistake or some crazy notion.
Why should my thoughts and words be a mistake? If they come from my experience of having an amazing connection with a higher self and greater consciousness then how on earth could they be a mistake? OK, I will accept this challenge. Holy shoot though, this might be a tough one. Or maybe it won’t be difficult at all. My different states of consciousness have differing thoughts and feelings. And my conclusion is that believing in a higher consciousness involves bridging a gap between two experiences or states of consciousness and granting realness and validity to the state of mind or consciousness less seldom experienced as a living human being. Perhaps this involves the same kind of faith as that of those who practice a religion and believe in a higher power. Perhaps this faith held by all those who practice and believe in a religion, should not in the eyes of some disbelievers appear to be a little gap of intelligence in otherwise very intelligent people. Perhaps their faith is not silly or a mistake.
Just a moment ago I suddenly thought of my three times great grandmother Marilla. In the past, I have had experiences of having a feeling that I was having a connection with her. I knew from my own family genealogy research that she had lost all three of her first three children when they were very young at the ages of 13 months, 4 months, and 12 months. And with me being her three times great granddaughter and with she being my three times great grandmother, I could not help but want to understand and empathize with her and her experience in a genuine and heartfelt manner as opposed to just thinking in a disconnected way, “Wow, that must have been terrible but I’m glad there was a happy ending.” I knew that I could not just think of my three times great grandmother and her life experiences in such a disconnected way without granting her a bit more of my true heart and empathy and feeling of love for her and the connection that we share. During one of those times, when I felt I was having an experience of being connected with her, I had a desire to know her and feel her spirit. I guess I must have asked her about her experience of losing all three of her first three children. The reply that I heard was that she felt abandoned by God. I just really had this instinct and gut feeling that those words were not my own words or my own thought or just some fantasy in my head. It was the experience that I have of connecting with and receiving awareness from outside of myself.
I just felt another connection with her tonight. I felt like she was sharing her very strong love and connection that she feels for and with her descendants.
(In the row boat are great great great grandmother Marilla’s 5th child and 2nd surviving daughter Ida, Ida’s daughter Mildred, and Mildred’s daughter Ruth who is my maternal grandmother. Marilla has many descendants from her two surviving daughters.)
And I think my higher self wants to tell me that beauty pageants for young children is abusive. I have been watching the series toddlers and tiaras, which I never watched when it originally aired. I hadn’t yet come to that thought or conclusion myself. I had recognized many instances where I had issues with what I was seeing. On the other hand, I also believed that there were parents and children for whom the parents had the mindset that if the experience stopped being positive and enjoyable to their child and they didn’t want to do it anymore, they would stop immediately. My higher consciousness would like to remind me that if the practice is abusive to any children at all, it is not ok even if others receive a multitude of trophies and prizes from it and have a good experience. Don’t be stupid now myself. That is my message to myself.
And my higher consciousness would also tell me to not even make an issue of whether or not S contributes anything her to shared apartments expenses. This is just the opinion of my expanded awareness. It would be so much easier to just choose the best and easier path from the outset. And a moment ago, my normal self had an insight that my expanded awareness is correct. The best outcome for everyone is to trust this insight. So here is another challenge from the expanded awareness and consciousness that I experience. Do you trust and believe in me? This is my challenge from my higher self.
And there is a thought for my brother. While I may have under appreciated my brother when he and I were growing up, I do consider him to be an amazing brother and I am proud of him for being so amazing in his firefighting career and also, of course, for being who he is.
And now I have a bit of a more humorous (I guess) thought. The sister in the “The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty” movie was a much nicer sister than I was because she never punctured her brother’s stretch Armstrong toy with a pen. 😲 But also, her brother maybe could have been a bit less of a younger butthead than mine was at times. 😂 It is true though that the relationship started off with me being no angel either. I evidently didn’t appreciate having a new brother at the age of three years and two months.
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